Change: The One Thing You Need To Know

I’m slightly unsettled by the subtle scratching sound of the wind swirling brittle leaves around my door frame and the impending darkness as gray clouds slink over the mountains. I warm my hands with a cup of tea and know that the bone-chilling cold of a Wyoming winter is around the corner.I’m not sure when the exact day will arrive, but I know I can’t stop the inevitable.What am I supposed to do in the meantime?Trapped between heavy boxes of winter gear and summer paraphernalia, I feel squeezed out of my current space.  I don’t relish the discomfort of the in-between places; not quite here, not quite there.Maybe you’ve been there or you’re there now?

• You know this relationship or job or situation isn’t working for you, but you’re not sure what it’ll look like if you leave?

• Maybe a loved one has passed away and you can’t make sense of who you are without this person?

• It also happens with joyful changes.  Maybe you’re a new parent - not quite ready to let go of your pre-kid identity, not quite sure who you are in this new role?

• Or maybe you know what makes your heart sing, but you’re afraid of what others will think if you follow your real passions?

When faced with change, the one thing that I share with all of my clients (and remind myself) during these uncomfortable times is…Change sucks.  (Tweet that.)What?!  That’s not helpful or positive or warm and fuzzy, you might be thinking.You’re right.  Stick with me though.  It has a good ending.You know when something’s getting ready to change. If you get quiet enough, you can feel it in the depths of your being.  You’ll always be able to look back and say, “I knew.”The bigger part of you knows when it’s time to move on, share your gifts with the world, or blossom into something you never thought yourself capable of, but it’s rarely easy.That’s why so many people don’t do it.When you change it shuffles the established order of things; family dynamics, relationships, finances and friendships.  Change rocks the boat and (gasp) might even piss off a few people.What would this world be like if there weren’t a few boat rockers and pissed off people? I’m sure Nelson Mandela, Jesus, Buddha, Susan B. Anthony and Martin Luther King, Jr. faced some push-back and had days where they thought, “This sucks.”   Or as Jesus more aptly put it “Why have you forsaken me?”But, where would our world be if these movers and shakers threw in the towel and decided to stay in the cozy space of familiarity? I ask you to consider the same question about your own life.What is the world missing out on when you stay in your comfort zone?Change. It can suck. Once we embrace the fact that change isn’t easy it removes the element of fear.  The difficulties are a normal part of the process.I’ll throw in a bonus and give you my second best tip regarding change.The suckiness won’t last forever.I promise.  A feeling of comfort comes with the simple awareness that change sucks and that what you’re going through won’t last forever. Trust the process. Trust yourself, the quiet voice inside, and whatever it is you believe in from the deepest part of your being.  What you’ll find on the other side will astonish you...and that rarely sucks.I’d love to hear from you in the comments below…

• What is the world missing out on when you stay in your comfort zone?

• What are your lessons, stories, and experiences of navigating change?

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